Itisi

I spent a hour or so browsing around various fashion sites this afternoon – not sure why because they tend to be as annoying as fashion magazines, but I suppose at least I don’t have to pay for them. Anyhoo, I’ve decided I’m not going to visit them again because, quite frankly, the advice they gave me was pretty darn useless.

I admit, I am a little over 25, so the latest, hot looks may not be quite the thing for me, but fortunately, some sites do cater for those women who have a little experience under their belts*. However, I can’t say I was very impressed with the suggestions they were making, not least because despite many assertions that being over 40 does not mean you have to dress in a dowdy fashion, they then went on to suggest a number of outfits which could only be described as, umm, dowdy.

I give you Exhibit Number 1: The ebook advertised on this page may be wonderful – I haven’t read it, so if you have, do let me know – but I don’t think I’ll be buying a copy if the accompanying photo is an indication of the contents. The last time I saw anyone wearing a blouse like that, it was Maggie Smith playing Miss Jean Brodie. And, with all due respect to Caryn Franklin, I’m not quite ready to dress like a frustrated old spinster just yet.

And on to Exhibit Number 2: More magazine, which apparently celebrates women over 40, had a whole section devoted to fashion in which I found this – if it doesn’t take you to the right image, click through until you come to page 9. That outfit is truly hideous, no woman of any age should ever wear anything that even remotely resembles that. (Well, not unless she is heading out to a fancy dress party with a bad taste theme.) In fact, it barely resembles an outfit, and looks more like someone has gone home in whatever was left over at the end of a jumble sale.

There were other examples, but I’ll spare you the details. I do wonder though quite what the people who pass on this ‘advice’ are really trying to do. Is it some kind of joke? Are these places staffed by young twenty-somethings who once lost a boyfriend to some glamourous Salma Hayek/Helen Mirren lookee-likee? Do other women actually follow along with this? Am I alone in not wishing to don garments that would make me look 20 years older? I didn’t wake up on my 40th birthday to find I suddenly resembled Granny Weatherwax, so why should I, or any other woman, turn into a dreary, old frump?

Oh, and if you are over 40 and wondering what to wear, my advice is whatever you bloody well feel comfortable in! But, don’t go around in something that flashes your knickers – that’s tacky at any age. And avoid velour, because it just looks nasty.

* Notice how I managed to avoid the use of the word ‘mature’ which has become a euphemism for old.

Currently listening to: 51st State by New Model Army

I appreciate you dropping by,
Please leave a comment, don’t be shy

I can’t remember when I last did a greatest hits post*, and I know how much you all love them – oh go on, you do – so here for your perusal are some of the more interesting ( I use that word loosely) search terms people have used to find this blog.

gay fart – This has been a perennial even though I have never written about such a thing, why would I? It’s both offensive and puerile. What people actually find is this, which was the same post accessed by the 9 people who have searched for fart list, peanut butter farter and meatloaf farter this month. I’m sure Mr Loaf never does that kind of thing though, or at least not to the extent that people would blog about it.

full boobs – OK, I admit, this one is my fault, but I have a feeling the people using it (all 10 of them) are probably a bit disappointed when they land here.

snot netball – That term leads to this post, but what I really want to know is: What the heck is snot netball!? On second thoughts, I don’t want to know because it sounds utterly revolting. Why would anyone search for such a thing? Honestly, they’ll let anyone use the t’internet these days**.

tyke talk – Phew, that’s a relief, not all my visitors are drunken rugby players. If you would like to learn about tyke talk, go here.

women trouble – Notice the plural. I’m guessing that is some poor chap who just can’t keep a girl. Maybe, he is the same person who looks for fart related subjects, which would kind of explain his perpetual singledom. Finding this probably didn’t help much. I mean, he’s depressed, lonely and then I mock his ‘equipment’. Mind you, some men pay good money for that kind of treatment, or so I’ve heard.

women in trouble – Lead to the post linked above, and was rather perplexing. I can’t work out whether it was a plea for help from people stranded somewhere – really, if that was you, the AA or Coastguard would have been a better bet – or maybe some nuns from the 1950s looking for fallen women. Or, just possibly, Ken Loach’s casting director.

hamster powered pc – I actually have one of those.

google heart – Yes, I heart Google too! And all it’s many wonders with the exception of maps.

mancheron – See it’s not just Ken and me! Nobody knows what that means. Well, except for clever-clogs who use those new-fangled dictionary things.

And finally: The person who searched for itisi definition won’t have found one, because it means whatever I bloody well want it to. Actually, that’s not true, there is an origin to the name,  and you are welcome to try and guess it. I have mentioned it in the past, and I have seen a couple of guesses, but are they correct?

I appreciate you dropping by,
Please leave a comment, don’t be shy

Today is Blog Action Day, and this year the theme is poverty.

Most people reading this will be fortunate enough to live in the world’s wealthiest countries, and while you may not describe yourself as rich, compared to the vast majority of people on the planet you are. However, even within wealthy countries, there are pockets of poverty, not the kind caused by famine, war or widespread disease, but poverty none less, and the people most affected by this poverty are the elderly.

When I was child it was quite common to see posters in doctors’ surgeries reminding us that ‘cold kills the old’ and urging patients to check on elderly neighbours who were at risk of dying from hypothermia. I can remember asking my mum how this could be and she explained that many elderly people simply could not afford to pay for the fuel to keep themselves warm in the winter.

That was in the 1970s, and over the next couple of decades fuel became cheaper, individuals became richer and the idea of old ladies freezing to death was consigned to history. Except, it wasn’t. Now, in 2008, a significant number of elderly people will face the choice between eating, and heating their homes this winter. Winters in the UK can be severe enough if you are young and healthy, the frail and ill must absolutely dread the arrival of cold weather knowing it means months of misery and horrible choices.

Personally, I find this abhorrent. We are the 5th richest country in the world, and if we can’t provide adequately for our parents and grandparents in their final years there is something seriously wrong with the way our society is run. It seems quite obscene to see gas and electric companies posting news of ridiculously large profits when their customers are struggling to pay their bills. Profits should not come before people, but I suppose that’s the subject for another post..

So, my request to you this Blog Action Day is, please keep an eye on your elderly friends and neighbours this winter and help them out if you can. And if you would like to do more, take a look at the Help the Aged website.

Thank you for reading!

Currently listening to: The Everlasting by Manic Street Preachers


I appreciate you dropping by,
Please leave a comment, don’t be shy

 . . . please pop over and say something nice about my guest post at Designer Daily. It’s all about beer commercials, or specifically, about the influence of Guinness ads.

I bet you didn’t know I had an interest in that kind of thing did you? Aha, you see, I am a woman of mystery. I can also bore for Britain about English drinking culture – which makes me a real barrel of laughs down the pub, ho ho.

Currently listening to: Janie’s Got a Gun by Aerosmith


I appreciate you dropping by,
Please leave a comment, don’t be shy

Found this while I was Stumbling last night. It was fun for 5 minutes so I thought I’d post it here.

The idea is:

Your Debut Album

1 – Go to http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:Random
The first random Wikipedia article you get is the name of your band.

2 – Go to Random quotations: http://www.quotationspage.com/random.php3
The last four words of the very last quote of the page is the title of your first album.

If you want to do this again, you’ll hit refresh to generate new quotes, because clicking the quotes link again will just give you the same quotes over and over again.

3 – Go to flickr’s “explore the last seven days” http://www.flickr.com/explore/interesting/7days/
Third picture, no matter what it is, will be your album cover.

Put it all together, that’s your debut album. 

I got Custard Apple who will be releasing an album called To Not Take Medicine, and here is the album cover.

I appreciate you dropping by,
Please leave a comment, don’t be shy