Expanding on tweets

Internet No Responses »
May 212009

I’m stuck for something to post about so I’m resorting to expanding on tweets. I shouldn’t really have told you that, should I? I could have fibbed and told you all it was a fabulous new idea. Hmm.

“@misfitduck I should post a bit of Marilyn Manson and my thoughts about why nappy changing isn’t an interesting topic to blog about lol“

This was part of a thread about me being added to a ‘mom bloggers’ directory. I couldn’t find any videos that weren’t low quality bootlegs, so no Manson (aren’t you disappointed?) but my point stands! Nappy changing; snot; stomach complaints and painful, gory birth stories just don’t make good reading. I can’t imagine why, but trust me, they just don’t. If your toddler regurgitates his breakfast all over your dog every morning, please don’t go into detail about the appearance, texture and smell. It is too much information. Anyone who tells you they do want to know about this stuff is being polite. Really! If they are genuine then they probably aren’t the sort of person you want within 500 yards of your blog.

I’m also a bit bemused about being listed in such a place. I’m not a mom blogger; I’m a mum who blogs. There is a difference! In fact, I find the term rather demeaning; it’s dismissive. It implies mothers with blogs are all pretty much the same and not very interesting – our heads are too full of thoughts of snot and washing powder obviously.

And having brought the ire of proud mom bloggers down on my head (there are lots of them; they stick together and hunt in packs), I move on to mocking the nicest person in Britain …

“Yeah, the words smug, self-promoter come to mind. Also, for a while I thought Myleene Klaas was a cleaning product, really.“

The first part doesn’t apply to Myleene Klaas, but I really did think her name was a brand of cleaning product. This was mostly because I first heard it in the sentence “Ooh, that Myleene Klaas is good”, and I assumed it was actually Mylene Class, something a bit like Cilit Bang, but more upmarket. I still think that works, the advertising jingle could be ‘My-lene, My-lene, gets your win-dows cl-ean’.

Off to see if there’s a blogger protection programme …

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Indignant Tortoise Is So Itchy
Posted by Kate at 6:54 pm Tagged with: , ,

Great People to Follow on Twitter

Internet 2 Responses »
May 132009

I decided I really should write a Twitter recommendation post; after all, the cool kids have all done it and I’d hate to miss the chance to leap onto a bandwagon. However, once I’d decided to do it, I realised it might have been a mistake. It’s really quite hard to draw up a definitive list; I was thinking there would be maybe five people, but it grew. And once you do have a list, how do you present it? I suppose the easiest way would be to paste in a list of links, but that’s rather pointless, so obviously I had to give some reason why you should follow these people.

Anyhoo, after much deliberation, here is my list, arranged in categories of sorts. The five people at the top get a special mention because (they’re my favourites) they’ve been particularly helpful towards me, said nice things about my blog or because they are the only two people who both read it and actually speak to me on Twitter; the rest of you either being somewhat averse to social networking, and/or to talking to me. Not sure which.

I digress, off you go, follow them all, and look after them!

@misfitduck (blog) – Bio: Expat, crash test dummy for the Swedish adult educational system
Why you should follow: Not the most prolific tweeter, but interesting none the less – loved her live-tweeting the US presidential inauguration.

@simonbarker (blog) – Bio: Part-time blogger – Full-time hi-tech gadget fan and as such I run a website all about them!
Why you should follow: One of the nicest people on Twitter, posts interesting links and is very witty.

@VladZablotskyy (blog) – Bio: My name is spelled ?????????? just in case you wonder.
Why you should follow: Polite, helpful and impressively multi-lingual.

@linnetwoods – Bio: I live aboard a schooner with my man and a cat… I’m a freelance writer and web mangler…
Why you should follow: One of the most active tweeters around, goes above and beyond to interact with her followers.

Brits:

@fotodayz (blog) – Bio: Teaches folk how to capture memories.
Why you should follow: Dorcas is fun, sociable and also a talented photographer.

@billythekid (blog) – Bio: If you follow me I will reciprocate. It’s nice to be nice. If you spam me I’ll block and tweet the block. It’s not nice to spam. Be social!
Why you should follow: Don’t be put off by his bio, he’s helpful, friendly and a little bit geeky, just doesn’t like spammers much.

@justamoochin – Bio: Fondly known as Moochie who smiles ….. can be found most days out on the Marshlands playing in mud xx.
Why you should follow: She’s fun, chatty, has a crazy sense of humour.

@LStacey (blog) – Bio: Musician / Geek / Thinker / Blogger / Social Nutjob
Why you should follow: Really nice bloke, despite his rude comments about the north; tweets about interesting subjects.

@scooby867 (blog) – Bio: Life is short! Break the rules! Forgive quickly! Kiss slowly! Love truly, Laugh uncontrollably ! YNWA x
Why you should follow: He’s a Liverpool fan and very funny (ha ha, not peculiar).

@ernmander (blog) – Bio: Turning into a vlogger. Time to try some unsafe velocities. Humor will be found here: I also suffer from The Pon-Farr
Why you should follow: Friendly, chatty techy guy who posts interesting stuff. Funny too!

Southern Hemisphere Peeps

@jackyan (blog) – Bio: CEO, Jack Yan & Associates; publisher, Lucire; director, the Medinge Group; co-author and author of branding books; typeface designer; mentor; speaker.
Why you should follow: Interesting and friendly, always has an intelligent opinion to share.

@liamvickery (blog) – Bio: The World’s greatest guitarist. Revolutionizing the way you think, one tweet at a time. Come on in and join the party! #hashtagmafia FTW!
Why you should follow: Really nice guy, posts good music and is the greatest guitarist in the world. Come on, you have to!

@Chisstwitt (blog) – Bio: Having a blast in the journey of life, living in Paradise with my lovely husband and three incredible children. I tweet for fun and to share ideas!
Why you should follow: Her bio says it all really; she’s fun and posts some interesting stuff.

@rustycharm (blog) – Bio: an online astronaut on helium…currently floating in the Auckland space trying to reconnect in a disconnected world, loves taking the piss outta spam tweets
Why you should follow: Only met him last week, but he’s very funny (once again, ha ha, not peculiar)

Writerly Types

@matchesmalone (blog) – Bio: Filmmaker, Magician, Intellectual Humorist, All Around Neat Guy.
Why you should follow: Very active, chatty and helpful.

@hopefulauthor (blog) – Bio: writer,wife mum, woman!
Why you should follow: Friendly and supportive, makes a great effort to interact.



I appreciate you dropping by,
Please leave a comment, don’t be shy

follow me on twitter

Indignant Tortoise Is So Itchy

Posted by Kate at 12:37 pm Tagged with: ,

The social networking dead zone

Internet No Responses »
May 092009

Weirdly, both Twitter and Friendfeed seem to have spontaneously combusted, or something. It’s very dull without them; like living in 2006.

Currently listening to: Oblivious by Aztec Camera

I appreciate you dropping by,
Please leave a comment, don’t be shy

follow me on twitter




Indignant Tortoise Is So Itchy
Posted by Kate at 12:14 am Tagged with: , , ,

Ode to Oprah

Humour, Internet, Poetry No Responses »
Apr 302009

Many words have been written and tweeted about Oprah’s controversial debut on Twitter, (although, apparently she is now bored with it) rather than reiterate what others have said, I decided to express my thoughts in (mediocre poetry) eloquent verse. Oh don’t roll your eyes – if WH Auden was around today he’d be writing this stuff. No, really!

Oh, Oprah, Oprah, Oprah,
Your name, it rhymes with … nothing.
(I tried to think of something
But the word just wasn’t there.)

You talk to me on tv.
Some days you seem much bigger,
On others you are smaller.
You quite often change your hair.

And now you come to Twitter
The regulars are angry,
Or maybe even twangry,
Because Oprah, you don’t care.

It’s not about you Oprah,
You really should be talking
To those folk who are forking
Out hard-earned cash for your wares.

So, Oprah, Oprah, Oprah,
Whose name it rhymes with nothing,
Start following or something.
Show the tweeters you play fair.

 

Posted by Kate at 6:09 am Tagged with: , ,

Celebrity Wisdom Part 2: 73 is the same as 1,000,000

Internet No Responses »
Apr 172009

“There are a million people who need to be thanked, because I am not following me, I’m following you” – Ashton Kutcher

It’s odd that he should say this because he’s only following 73 people.

 

Posted by Kate at 1:12 pm Tagged with: ,
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